7.28.2009

HELP!

It's official.
I'm about to lose it.
I feel like my ship is just about to sink.

Ben has thrush again.
Thus, I have thrush again. 
I have never been more miserable.  Ever.
When he is hungry I fight back the tears.  I don't want to feed him because it hurts so badly.

He also doesn't want to go to bed until at least midnight.  This isn't that great when I have to be up, ready, have Ben nursed with him and Jax in tow, and off to work at 8:00am three days a week.

That's early when you have no sleep.

And did I mention poor little Ben has the worst gas on the planet?  His little colicy belly is making him hurt.  His crying when the his belly is tense is making me hurt.

Now, as for Jax he can't live without Mickey Mouse.  He has figured out where the TV power button is.  If you even think about turning it off so he doesn't watch TV all day long he throws a fit.  Body thrown on the ground, crying.  Wonderful.

This having two babies thing is a lot harder than I was anticipating.  Every night I pray that I will be more patient and that I will be able to figure this thing out.  

But, as for now I am tired.  I am in serious pain from thrush.  Help!!

15 comments:

ScottandKristenJohnson said...

I am so sorry!! I promise it will get better!! You have had a rough couple of months, but when everyone is healthy, it really isn't that bad! Let me know if I can help with ANYTHING!! Seriously, I would love to have Jax over for a play day!

Lyssa said...

Oh Goldie! I am in tears just reading this! Motherhood is HARD! And I wish I knew what you were going through with Thrush but luckily I havne't had it, knock on wood, yet. But I can tell you that it does get easier! But just take one HOUR at a time, seriously. Pace yourself and don't set too high expectations for yourself. Just take it easy. Do the best you can. The time will pass that Jax won't be watching TV all day long, trust me, that's how I got through most of Emma's child hood. And you and Ben will get through this. but it totally sucks and that's the best way to describe it. I really do wish I were closer to help you in some way!

Austin and Andrea said...

Well..I don't really know what thrush is, but it sounds horrible :( Howcome you have to get up sooo early??? That really sucks. I'm sorry. Just look forward to when they get old enough to play together, and at least they are cute???

Kelsey said...

You poor thing! That must be why you were in so much pain feeding Jax yesterday. I'm so sorry! How miserable. Hang in there and if you need me to take the kids for a couple of hours, don't hesitate to call. Livy would love some friends. Or you could come over too and we could just hang out and let the kids play outside. I hope you and Ben get feeling better.

Esther Noelle said...

Goldie, sorry to be blog stalking you, I found your blog through other branch people... I just couldn't read this and not comment! I hope you are doing ok! Honestly, the recovery/dealing with a newborn was so so so hard for me! Dealing with thrush and nursing... and swine flu... and you're working?? Wow! I just wanted to let you know I will be thinking of you! That is so much to handle - I would be such a wreck and so overwhelmed! And we live so close - I'd be happy to bring you dinner or watch Jax or something sometime!

Heather Lee said...

do you think Holland would mind being the only child?

sarah said...

Golds! I know it's hardly any consolation, but I am so sorry. I will say that Mylicon drops helped Jack's tummy aches a lot, but I had to use them regularly in order for it to make a difference- if you wait to use them when he actually has the tummy ache...it's too late. You could give them to Ben with water or just drop them in his mouth...
Just know that you are not crazy for feeling overwhelmed...you've had a rough month! Please call if you need anything...love you!

kennan said...

call brooke. she's been there with the 2 kids under 18 months. i am sorry, it gets easier. i promise.

B RACHEL AND LENNON said...

Goldie,

I have the cure for a colicy baby. I am serious. My little sister had colic so bad. She would never stop crying. My mom got something called Gripe Water. It isn't the kind that you buy at Target though. It is at the provo pharmacy called Rock canyon pharmacy. It is over the counter and it helps so much. My sisters brother-in-law is a pediatrician and highly reccommended it also. I gave a bottle to Maggie and it saved her too. It really works but you have to go get it at Rock Canyon pharmacy (3153 N Canyon RD). It is right by Timpview high. Let me know if you go get it. Promise it works.

Konold's said...

Oh man you poor thing! You are totally scaring me!! I didn't know you were working??? Where?? I hope your not teaching, that is too big of a job to have while also being a mommy. Our sons need to play!!

annie and jared said...

i'm so sorry goldie.. sounds like you are having it rough. i wish i had some great advice for you, somedays i feel overwhelmed with olive and my new load of homework, but i can't imagine how much more stressful 2 babies would be. olive is also starting to be pretty obsessed with tv, and will put in her own dvd and turn on the tv! then i feel guilty when she sits in front of it all day so i turn it off, and the fits begin. i feel for you.

jon and tiffany said...

Goldie, like some of the others I found you through some other friends blogs. I am not someone you know at all, but I promise I am not a crazy! And like the others I couldn't read this and not leave a comment.

I am a professional at thrush. My little boy Jaxson kept getting thrush off and on until he was about 6months old. I know thats horrible, but just hang in their. Anyways this is what you do and you have to do religiously..... For 14days every time before and after you feed your baby you need to wash your boobies with warm water and soap. After you have fed him and washed up, apply Lotrimin (antifungal) to the boobies, after every feeding. As for the baby, and you might want to ask your docter because I can't remember exactly but give him gentian violat. Its messy, really messy, but it works. You soak up a little of the gentian violat on a cottan swab and swab it in babys mouth. He will have a stained purple mouth. What i can't remember is if you do the GV after every feeding or just couple times a day 2 or 3 times. If this isn't already a suggestion that your doctor has made, definitaly ask what he thinks. The reason you and your baby might keep getting thrush is because it actually isn't being cured all the way, which is what my problam was and I finally did this little method after 6m and it went away, never to come back. Please ask your docter or nurse what they think of this method before you try it. I got this method from my nurse and it did work, but everyone is different and every baby is different and I would not want to give any advise that would harm you or your baby. Good Luck, I hope the thrush goes away. And as for your sinking ship it does get better. I have two kids that are 25m apart Jax is 12m now and him and his sister are able to play together and keep each other busy. The first 6m are the hardest, hang in their.

LinDsEy ShaUn said...

goldie i have to say that i am sorry . . . obviously that you are going through that and i am also grateful because listen to all of this advice you got on your blog! it is super helpful, at least i think and when the problem comes knockin on my door, i will just head over to your blog and read up!
hang in there friend.

Heather Lee said...

oh and I did want to be supportive. Holland would LOVE LOVE jax to come over and play, even if he does ignore her and sit in front of the telle all day =) JK we would totally have a good time. Send him my way after your vacay. Hooray. Have a good day. Call me call me, whatta you say.

georgeandmarie said...

Goldie, sorry to hear its been a bad bout at your place lately! Being a mom is the hardest job ever!! But its the most rewarding too!! Makaiya got thrush like 4 time in a row it never really went away for about 4 or 5 months. Which meant she didn't eat or sleep well at all cause she was in pain all the time. She went through 3 bottles of the what used to be the purple stuff. I went to Good Earth and got primadophilus for children, its in the herb section just ask the attendants and they'll find it for you. Its a powder you keep in the fridge and give it to them once a day mixed in bottle of liquid. It just a probiotic that does wonders!! Within like 2-3 days I could tell a huge difference and by a week it was gone and never came back. I gave it to her for about 3 weeks just to make sure it stayed away and she was a much happier baby!! Good Luck!!